Holpineville

So Cute I Can't Bear to Look for Long

Ruby and one of her long haired friends both cut their hair short this weekend.  The chopped-off parts are being donated for a kids' chemo wig project. 

I was really surprised when Ruby said she was ready to do it, and we imposed a 36 hour waiting and reflection period to be sure, and then we had the girls do it together, for moral support.  In the end, the moms and the mom-friend hairstylist were all crying, and the girls were bouncing off the walls in excitement about their new looks and a future without the Battle of the Comb and the Tangles.  No more tears, indeed!

Ruby had a little less hair to donate than her friend, and the hairstylist got a little fancy, so it ended being a lot shorter than I had figured.  But it is So. Incredibly. Cute. I can't even believe it's my kid, she looks so different.  Ruby has vowed to keep her hair that way for a while, although I keep assuring her she'll have plenty of time to decide before the next trim.

We took some nice photos of the cutting ceremony, but they are all on my friend's camera, so you'll have to settle for the ones I took of her grumpy self this morning. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here is one of Carl, proudly showing off his trim (which two separate cutting sessions to acheive):

 

T is for Thursday, Test, and Tantrum

Carl came out of school wearing a lot of frosting Tuesday, and when I asked about it, he was excited to say that they had “rockabama” cupcakes for their snack in celebration of the inauguration.  And really, it was a metaphorical cupcake day for me, too, for ideological reasons, but also because I am a patriotic sap, I like a good ceremony and I adore a good speech.   Ruby seemed really interested in the inauguration, and she seems generally to have discovered politics, and history, or the concept that important things happened before she was born. 

For instance, on Sunday, we went to the airport to send Rod the coat he forgot when he left on his trip.  Fedex and UPS were closed, and the folks at the 24 hour post office couldn’t get it to him until late on Tuesday.  We tried to find an airline that would take it, but discovered that sending a package on a plane on the spur of the moment without help from a freight company is something else one can’t do in the post-9/11 era.  Which confused Ruby, so we had to revisit the whole hijacked planes/terrorism/etc. thing, which made me sort of teary and so sad that I had to explain about evil and people hating our country.  Later in the week, she insisted on revisiting the topics of how presidential elections work, why it’s a big deal to have an African-American president, why are we having a war with Iraq anyhow, and by the way, what’s torture?  I can’t decide if I should encourage her to be informed and ask questions, or to switch off the NPR when the kids are in the car.  

Rod is still gone.  He will be back this weekend, but it seems a long time away.   I am getting bad reviews of my skills at waking the kids up and getting them to school on time (in my defense, they haven’t had an official tardy slip yet).  This afternoon/tonight featured tantrums and whining by mostly Carl and partly Ruby.  We got through it all, but at one point all three of us were in tears.  

Ruby is planning a big tea party for tomorrow evening, this time to include game playing and Lego construction in addition to tea and snacks.  Thankfully, I think Carl and I are the only guests, so I don’t think I’ll have to cook much.  Ruby still has a couple of more days of standardized testing to go; this ends up being at least two weeks when not much other work gets accomplished.  She may not resent it, but I sure do.  Ruby was slightly upset on the first day about a math problem on the test that she couldn't answer: 202-15=?  She had an idea of how to figure it out, but there wasn't time, and she hasn't done much three digit math on paper alone.  I don't know if that was the only thing she had trouble with, but she sure talked about it a lot.

A funny thing today: Carl told his friend’s mom that Rod has a hairy penis.  I am assuming it was part of the whole ‘parts in the pants/bodily fluids/all the gross words we know’ dueling monologue that Carl and his friend get into sometimes.  But maybe he just wanted to share? Boys are weird.

To Really Honor Someone

In her best teacher-speak, Ruby explained to Carl today that, in honor of Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, she decided to wear her black tights.  Because, “he was black,” not as some kind of mourning gesture.  She was all full of respect and admiration for the guy, so all I could do was titter behind her back.  I promise to teach her some nuances sometime soon, okay? She meant well.

I decided we Holpines should do something with the concept of Martin Luther King Jr. Day as a day of service.Unfortunately, I did not actually identify a suitable opportunity for us to be of service ahead of time, oh no.  Instead, this morning, I gave the kids my junior abridged version of the MLK biography and significance of the day, and then announced that we were going to contribute to the community by picking up trash in our neighborhood.

It ended up being a good activity for Ruby and Carl and me.  The weather was beautiful, and after the initial pro-forma whining, the kids were happy to go out with bags and the grabber tool, and downright excited when they spotted trash.  As a good little environmentalist, Ruby wisely insisted on bringing a separate bag for the recyclables. 

Our neighborhood is…. well, how shall I put it?  Urban?  In transition?  And there are some nearby empty lots, convenience stores, bars, and a busy street, so there was no shortage of cans, plastic bags, fast food containers, and beer bottles to pick up.  It was gross, dirty work, but I am very glad we did it.  The weather was beautiful, the kids got a much better understanding of why littering is such a bad thing to do, and the ‘hood is slightly cleaner.   On the depressing side, my recycling bin is now full of really dirty slimy stuff, my shoes smell like sewage and old beer, and we only made a dent in the random trash quotient on two blocks.

There is not so much to report, otherwise.  Rod left us Saturday for some business trip of monumental scientific importance, and doing his share of the housework and childcare is keeping me busy and tired.  I had a big deal doctor’s visit on Saturday. I am turning down the chance to be the boss of the PTO next year (flattering, but I’m no fool.)  The exterminator visited last week and took care of my roach issue, but he says we seem to have mice in the attic, too, and so I need to schedule the (expensive) (and very invasive) Rodent Control Service. (Note: our cats are completely worthless and should be ashamed of themselves.)

The kids had a sleepover this weekend, watched more videos than they should, played with Ruby’s virtual pony, built Legos, read books, went shopping with me, and played at the park.  Ruby had a “piano party” on Saturday, where she won a prize for having done the second-highest number of pages of music theory homework last quarter.  The kids had dance class today, which was practically a private lesson because so many kids took the holiday off.  They need baths.  Ruby has standardized testing all this week, which is stressful, because it’s so not-Montessori, although Ruby says she will get to watch part of the inauguration at school tomorrow, too.   Tomorrow, I will get up extra early to take them to school and try to cajole Ruby into eating a decent breakfast before her test.  The piano tuner comes this week, and I have yet another stop on my Tour of Doctors, this time the dermatologist, because I have to keep my zits at bay.  Mostly, I will just be missing Rod, but it's not much fun to blog about.

With Friends Like These

Last week, a couple of my kids’ friends and their mom came over to play.  The mom needed to send an urgent e-mail, so she used my computer.  While she was sitting there pressing "send," her daughter asked to show Ruby her horse on the computer.  So Friend and her mom gave Ruby a look at her "horse" and this lovely web site, which is sort of like a cross between Webkins and Pokemon, I guess.

Which was bad enough.  But then friend asked her mom to set Ruby up with a virtual pony of her own, and the three of them were deep in the site registration process before I could come up with a polite way to say, “no, no, no, I beseech you, please, please please don’t.”  I hemmed and hawed about how Ruby really doesn’t spend time on the computer yet, and doesn’t have an e-mail address, but they were all looking at me with cheery little hopeful faces, including Ruby….so I crumbled.  I let her use one of my junk e-mail accounts and helped her figure out a user name and password. 

Now Ruby wants to check on her high-maintenance “horse” every day, plus all of its horsey friends. That part of the site is free, but naturally there is a money making component to this deal: one can spend “horseshoes” on fancy virtual gear to “decorate” one’s virtual cottage/stable.  There are a few free (if time-consuming) ways to get horseshoes, but to really have enough horseshoes to buy stuff, you have to spend real-life money on trading cards at the store and enter the codes found on them online.  This also gets you more horse friends!  And sparkly ribbons for your stable! 

I have several big issues with all of this. 

First, Ruby needs to spend less time sitting around staring at a screen, not more.  She barely has time for homework, piano, and goofing around with Carl as it is. 

Second, I hate sharing a computer; just an unattractive aspect of my personality.  I will let you check your e-mail when you visit me, and Rod can touch it, but that’s about it. The $300 sacrifice-it-to-the-kids PC is suddenly looking attractive. 

Third, it’s the slippery slope argument: today, it’s a virtual pony on a web site that runs slow and crashes often.  Tomorrow, she’ll be hacking my iTunes account, IM-ing some guy she met at the park, and playing Second Life.  Seriously, if this keeps up, Ruby is going need an e-mail account of her own.  Yes, I know, many six year olds have them and it’s inevitable at some point; it just wasn’t on the schedule for my child yet. 

Fourth, I have a big problem with spending real money on things that only exist as pretend toys.  I have explained this to Ruby and she gets it, but she still wants to play.  Rod and I have reluctantly concluded that her allowance is hers to waste if she wants.  So far, she hasn’t done it, but I imagine she’ll be looking over the pony cards the next time we’re at a store that carries them. 

And finally, Carl is also enamored of the virtual horses.  He likes to sit by Ruby and “help” her while she does two-dimensional pony maintenance. So he’ll be wanting his own before long, too.

And yet I have to confess that I understand.  My games never involved spending money, but I’ve spent way too much time playing Tetris, Web Boggle, the Sims, Web Sudoku, virtual crosswords, mah jong…..I can’t really come down hard on the kid for doing exactly what I and most of the people I know have done at one point or another.  In fact, I even logged onto the pony site last night to earn Ruby some free horseshoes (I’m much better at the stupid games than she is so far). And while I was there, I had to brush and pat Ruby's horse for a while, so that she wouldn't be "sad." Pathetic, both of us are.

Resolved

I keep writing posts and then deleting them.  Either they are dull, or they are sharing way too much personal information.  So, I’m sorry for the slow trickle of news this year. 

I have also been busily working on my New Year’s resolutions.  You can rest easy, because “blog more,” did not make the cut.  No one else around here puts much stock in resolving; it’s just me, although Ruby has said that this year she’s going to keep books in the car so that she can read while she’s riding, and that she’s going to brush her hair every day (please, please, please!).

So, anyway.  Here's my list.  You are not invited to ask me in July how it's going, or next January how I did. 

       1)      Play the piano more.  Just because.

 

2)      That law license: it’s lovely, but I find myself forgetting everything I used to know.  I plan a little reading/reviewing/meeting so as to keep it from becoming just a pretty piece of paper.

 

3)      More books.  More knitting.  Less Internet.

 

4)      This will be the year my bedroom ceases to be the family’s archive and long-term stuff storage facility.  I will see the carpet. Yes, I will.

 

5)      I will find a way to remember to take those calcium supplements the doctors keep nagging about.  In my defense, they are tricky because you can’t just gulp them down along with all those other pills.

 

6)      The fat: I must do something drastic about it this year, before my pancreas/liver/joints/u-pick-the-part gives up and things gets medically extremely ugly.  However, I have a long and ultimately depressing history here, so I’m taking time to formulate a plan.

 

7)      I will my best to limit dinners out to one per week, although it may very well kill me to cook that much. 

 

8)      Furthermore, I will moderate my children’s intake of macaroni and cheese, hot dogs, and chicken nuggets, even if it kills them.

 

9)      I will make the kids go to the park or somewhere else where active play is possible, so they will incidentally exercise, at least one extra time per week.  I’ll join in the aerobic activity sometimes, too.

 

10)   I will listen to Rod more attentively.  I’ll plan dates, without resenting having to do the planning. I will work on being a nicer person to be married to.  

 

So now that you're laughing at mine, what's on your list?

Gifts

I meant to have said earlier that this was the first Christmas that Ruby bought gifts for people on her own.  I agreed to take her to Target alone with her bag o'cash (no wallet for her, no, it's a tote bag!).

Ruby marched through the store, choosing a shirt for Rod, a set of Ninja Turtle toys for Carl, and some drinking glasses that I wasn't supposed to officially realize were for me.  She had just enough money, which was more of a happy coincidence than smart shopping, although she was talking and thinking about how much things cost. She also bought a screwdriver for Rod at the hardware store, insisting that he would like it even though I hinted that perhaps we had plenty of screwdrivers already. ("He likes tools, Mommy!  I know he'll use it!")All in all, I was pretty impressed with how thoughtful she was about choosing things. 

In anticipation of Ruby's gift to Carl, Rod took Carl shopping for a gift for Ruby, which is a kit to make a robot crab.  Ruby and Carl opened their presents to each other at the same time, and it was really sweet, how excited they both were.  

New Year, New Deductible

Carl had a major coup in the family medical expenses sweepstakes today: First one to spend medical dollars in 2009!  First child to require stitches!  And, bonus stealth ear infection!

I don't know exactly how many stitches he got. "A whole bunch!" said the plastic surgeon. The story of the cut is that we went bowling this morning, to celebrate or kill time on the last day of winter break.  Carl somehow tripped and fell as he was walking toward the lane from the ball return machine, and landed on his face.  I thought he'd just had a good jolt and maybe bitten his tongue, but when he finally lifted his head off my shoulder, there was blood running off his chin but none near his mouth.  He lifted his head a bit, and there it was, a horizontal gash on his chin that was an inch or so long, and the sides were at least 1/4" away from each other.  Best we can figure, he hit the pointy part of his chin on the sharp edge of the little step up to the wood-floor bowling surface.

To Carl's credit, he calmed down pretty quickly, and it didn't bleed much.  Rod, Mr. Prepared, had a big ol' band-aid in his car.  But Carl wouldn't go back to bowling.  I had nervously phoned the doctor's office for guidance and was waiting for a call back when Carl firmly announced that he needed to go to the doctor. 

When my kids say they need to go to the doctor, I try to give them the benefit of the doubt and take them.  So, we left Ruby bowling with a friend and headed out. Of course, the doctor's office was closing for lunch, so Carl and I went home to wait for a while first.  By the time it was time to go to the doctor, Carl was acting pretty normal and I figured he'd just be getting a fresh bandage from the nurse and I would look like silly hysterical panic mom again.  In fact, Carl apparently confused the doctor with the dentist, because when I asked him why he wanted to go, he said, "to get a toy," and around here, the dentist hands out toys, not the doctor.

But, for once, we were vindicated! In fact, the nurses took the band-aid away and left Carl with a gaping open wound on his chin.  The doctor took a look and then starting phoning plastic surgeons to deal with it, most of whom apparently took today off, so it was hard work.  But she found one, and booked us an appointment, pausing only to also diagnose an infection in the ear Carl said had "too much wax" yesterday.  He had absolutely no symptoms of an ear infection, not even a runny nose, I swear it.  How in the heck am I supposed to know he's sick, huh?   

Carl and I drove off and then spent quite a while waiting on the plastic surgeon, Carl eating the lollipops the office staff gave him and sculpting with the wrappers, me reading him tidbits from JAMA and Harper's Bazaar (note to self: stash some waiting room amusements in the trunk for this sort of emergency).  Finally, the doctor arrived, glanced at the bloody hole, and called for his Minor Procedure Kit.  Thanks to the wonders of topical anesthetic, Carl didn't seem to be feeling much, and he held amazingly still for a giant injection of something-caine, and then a lot of sewing, a layer of glue, and some steri-strips.  He is to avoid splitting it back open (like that's a risk we can really control for) and he goes back to have it checked next week, and his ears checked the week after that.  Yay for insurance!

Carl looks and acts basically normal now.  I don't have a "before" photo, but the "after" one is decidedly non-dramatic (ignore the Cheeto residue that I haven't completely photo-shopped out):

 

So, I still don't know exactly what a cut that needs stitches looks like.  I can tell you it doesn't necessarily bleed a lot. 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh, and Ruby would like the world to know that she won the bowling game.  Another milestone: she just finished reading a whole chapter book silently to herself for the first time, which she did over the course of several car rides.  She has resolved to keep books in the car this year so that she can keep doing it. 

Last Year is So Over

I read through the Holpineville archives for 2008, and I have to congratulate you for continuing to check in, because it was mostly dull reading.  Here is my summary:

Household News: 

Rod and I celebrated our sixteenth wedding anniversary, and 21 years of hanging around each other.  The Holpines individually turned 40, 39, 6 and 4. 

Rod took about six business trips.  Andrea took three fun trips. We had four family trips, none to anyplace exotic, but vacation is vacation.

Rod worked a lot, mostly on a project he’d rather not have, but also on one at least one he’s excited about.  He got a another pile of patents.  Andrea was busy in what she likes to think of as her early retirement: driving kids around, scouring the Internet and resale shops for bargains, getting pedicures, and reading magazines.  She also was the room parent for Ruby’s class, administrator for a big online parenting community, co-chair of the major annual fundraising gala for the kids’ school, asporadic knitter, and an occasional blogwriter.  

We spent a lot of time coping with minor illness of various kinds, but overall everyone’s been healthy and happy.  

Holpineville weathered Hurricane Ike with nothing but emotional distress damages caused by nine days without power and the disappearance of our beloved kitty Lizzie in the aftermath of the storm.

On the house front, we replaced some rotting windowsills, created a composting system, made improvements to the garage, and slightly upgraded the family room furnishings.  

Kid Highlights:

Ruby finished kindergarten and went on to first grade with the teacher and classroom that she’ll have through third grade.  Her reading has improved dramatically this year.  Outside of school, she had a lot of fun in dance class and started piano lessons.  She made a quilt and learned some basic crochet and other crafts.  Ruby learned to ride a bike without training wheels.  She lost six teeth this year and sprouted four new molars. 

Carl moved from the crib to a big-kid bunk bed and had his first sleepovers at friends’ houses.  He left his preschool for the same public Montessori school Ruby attends, where he is thriving in the early childhood (pre-k through kindergarten) class.  He learned to write his name and picked up many very interesting facts that he brought home to share. 

Both kids made great strides in learning to swim this year.  They both love Scooby Doo, art, science, and reading, and they have been playing happily together more and more.

I have to say, it was nice to have a rather uneventful year.

__________

I think the party was fun last night; at least I had a good time. We had a huge crowd, and the kids all behaved amazingly well.  Not everyone stayed until midnight, but Ruby and Carl and a few of their friends were still awake to pop the confetti-filled noisemakers and some leftover Christmas crackers.  Here are the kids, in the immediate aftermath: